Resilience: definition 2) "an ability to recover from or adjust
easily to misfortune or change", from Merriam-Webster's Online
Dictionary
To me, resilience means facing difficulties or adversity of
being diagnosed with cancer or having a loved one diagnosed with
cancer and trying to do something to make this event less of a
negative impact on your life. The act of doing something gives you
a sense of control or at least that you have control over something
(even if just one thing) rather than being totally helpless in your
situation. In my personal experience finding a bit of control lead
to hope and hope lead to resilience.
We designed Think About Your Life to provide people with
structured way to think through the adversity the are facing and to
discover an action they can take (do something to find
control).
Earlier this month, I received an email from a colleague about
her experiences using the website in the discovery stage of the journey with cancer. She
is supporting a friend who is going through tests and surgery to
determine if she has cancer. While you are waiting to
find out if you or a loved one has cancer, emotions can run from
one extreme to the other. People have described the "waiting"
experience to feel like torture. We can't change the process of
diagnostic testing, but we can find ways to cope with the waiting.
It is possible to identify what it is we need to do in order to get
through the day. In the email from my colleague she explained how
using the hopes and fears tool helped her sort out her feelings and
face her fears - to do something while waiting and feel a sense of
control.
Resilience is also experienced when the "adversity" isn't
necessarily getting a cancer diagnosis, but finding our way forward
after treatment. Linda lives in Australia and has graciously
offered to share her one page profile.
She is in the new normal phase of her journey with cancer.
Below, Linda shares her thoughts after considering what is
important to her now and support she needs in her life right now,
two years after finishing treatment for cancer.
"Completing the one page profile has made a huge difference
to the way I view my life at the moment. Reflecting on what is
important to me and my hopes and dreams was a timely reminder to
focus on the positives, and where I am right now in life is exactly
where I am meant to be.
During the last two years I have been on a mission to make a
difference and get my business to the point where it is financially
viable. I have slowly become caught-up in the web of work. I put
pressure on myself to achieve extraordinary success, …to be living
proof that you can not only "survive" the disease - you can achieve
success and flourish.
I could almost see the valuable lessons I had learnt from my
journey [with cancer] slipping through my fingers. Lessons of
humility, compassion, gratitude, acceptance being present to each
and every moment no longer spoke their messages loudly but remained
a faint whisper in the background of my days.
Through using the one page profile all the lessons from my
journey came flooding back with resounding clarity and I have felt
more content and positive over the past few days and months. It has
enabled me to approach my work and life differently, without the
burden of pressure I put upon myself and reconnect with my sense of
fun and spontaneity."
